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Sexual harassment

How to avoid committing sexual harassment

by on Dec.10, 2017, under Posts>Opinions>Society>Sexual harassment

I have been sexually harassed and assaulted by both strangers and acquaintances. So I support the Metoo movement. In the meantime, I was accused of sexual harassment (for sending love messages through emails) when I was in my 20s and I have learned my lessons. So I am writing this post to give my advice on how to avoid committing sexual harassment.

Firstly, make sure you know why someone wants to talk to you or meet with you. There can be 999 reasons for someone to want to talk to you or meet with you other than wanting to be close to you. When someone wants to talk to you or meet with you, it does not mean that he/she is interested in you.

Secondly, when someone is interested in you, he/she may just want to know more about you. He/she may not have fallen in love with you. Only when people have fallen in love with you will they not feel being harassed sexually.

Thirdly, when people want to have a relationship with you, they prefer that you respond to their initiatives in certain ways rather than you taking the initiative, because they want to make sure that you have really fallen in love and could not help but to respond to them.

The rule of thumb is not to assume that you are so popular that people will fall in love with you no matter what. People fall in love only after they feel being admired and respected, on top of having admiration for you. Even getting admiration requires some self-discipline, not just popularity. If you lower your self-respect, he/she will lose interest in you even if you are popular.

When two people are truly in love with each other, they will overcome all the shyness naturally and get intimate. So don’t worry that the above rules will prevent people who are truly in love from getting intimate.

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